Darkness
by Marie Nomad
Summary: Takes place after New X-Men 140. Logan finally finds Scott and decides to help him with his problems. Some swearing.


This fic takes place after New X-Men 140. All characters belong to Marvel Comics and I did not get permission to use them. Feedback appreciated.   
  
Darkness  
  
By Maria Cline  
  
"I can't believe he stole my bike." Logan grumbled as he drove the car down the road. He loved that bike, he put so much into it and it was his style. He and his bike had been through many missions and had been damaged time and time again. Of course, his bike made it through. Logan wasn't shocked that Cyclops can ride a motorcycle. For some reason, he had taken to the motorcycle after his return from the dead. These days Cyke had been unstable, the strained marriage between himself and Jean, the way Scott had been distancing himself more than ever, and he stole his bike.  
  
Scott Summers would never steal his bike.   
  
Logan doesn't know his real name or his parents. He didn't even know his own age, yet he knows people. The way they smell and look when they feel something. He can't read minds but he can read people. To him, Scott was an open book, even with his eyes hidden behind a ruby quartz visor.   
  
The bar's dim lights showed the way to a parking lot and under the street light was Logan's motorcycle, slightly dented but still living. The man smirked to himself as he parked the car. Scott wasn't the type to just ran off at random, he was still orderly despite his state of mind. He needed a place dark place to brood and a bar is perfect. He got out of the car and went inside. He can smell the cigarette smoke and the liquor in the air. There was also a stench of despair and sorrow that only he and telepaths can sense. Scott was sitting there, nursing a drink just staring into nothing.  
  
Logan watched him, he didn't know how bad Scott's mental state was. Scott wasn't paying attention to anything; it was hard to tell with the visor covering his eyes. Logan slipped in and went to a dark corner and listened carefully. He had to observe Scott before trying anything or risk damaging his wounded heart.   
  
Scott sipped his drink carefully, as if scared to become drunk. He drank the same drink for an hour. The good news is that he wasn't drunk. A drunk Cyclops is dangerous. The bad news is that Scott was sane and he can be just as deadly.   
  
"Hey!" A drunk man stumbled up to the relatively sober mutant. "Freak! What's with the eyewear?" He snatched the visor off. Logan stumbled onto his feet, half expecting red beams to smash into the walls. He can handle optic blasts with his healing factor but the poor bums wouldn't dodge it. Besides, his bike might get wrecked.  
  
Scott just smiled as he kept his eyes closed. "You made a stupid mistake. Do you know why I wear the visor? It's not just for fashion or to give me power." His eyelids glowed with a red light causing even Logan to get nervous. "I can kill you just by looking at you, do you know that? I can destroy an entire mountain just by staring. How many can boast about that? Do you the scariest thing is? I can't control it. If I open my eyes right now, without the visor, I will turn you into a heap of blood and guts on the floor. So, please just give me my visor back and you will live." With shaking hands, the drunk placed the visor back over Scott's eyes and ran out of the room with everyone else.  
  
"That's one way to improve human/mutant relations." Logan grunted as he went up to Scott. Scott looked up at Logan almost disinterested. They stared at each other for a long moment and finally, the shorter mutant said, "You stole my bike."  
  
"It was convenient." Scott excused as he got out the keys and tossed it to Logan. "It needs gas."  
  
Logan tossed it back and said, "Gas it yourself." He sat down on a stool next to Scott and grabbed a nearby abandoned bottle of beer and drank it down. Unlike Scott who was just sipping so he can drink without getting drunk, Logan was just guzzling it down with his healing factor taking care of the alcohol. "You made a mistake, Slim. Going to Emma like that."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Everyone knows you have problems, you could've gone to someone else."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Hank, the professor, Xorn, even me. And I know for a fact that none of us would flirt with you."  
  
"None of you are my type."  
  
Logan stared at Scott and took another swig of beer. "Why her?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Did she manipulate you telepathically?"  
  
"No. It's... complicated." Scott held his head as he stared at his drink. "I know what I did was stupid and wrong and dangerous but... I don't know what's wrong with me."  
  
"You've been unstable since you came back from 'the dead'." Logan observed, "You have been edgier, darker."  
  
"I've been fighting it!" Scott snapped, "I've been trying too hard to go back to normal!" His eyes lit up the visor and Logan sat back. The light dimmed down and he shook his head. "Sorry, I just feel... strange."  
  
The bar was so quiet with the two men drinking. The bar just grew darker and finally Scott spoke up, "I was never adopted."  
  
Logan just nodded as he took another open beer bottle.   
  
"No body wanted me because of my brain damage. The second the potential parents hear of my brain damage, they just bolt off." Scott explained, "Nobody wanted me. So, I just became the model kid. I don't fight, I don't cry, I just lock everything away. I figured that if I behave perfectly, someone would want me. Even after I ran away, I behave as good as I can, still hoping that someone would find me and take me in. No one did."  
  
"Chuck took you in." Logan spoke up.  
  
"He wanted me for my powers." Scott's voice cracked slightly from the tears. "I was the first X-Man and I have to be the example to all. I worked hard to be leader, it was the only place that accepted me. Ever since, En Sabath Nur possessed me, things felt different." He paused as he looked down. "I don't know who I am any more."  
  
"You've been repressing yourself all your life. No matter how hard you try, you are still Human." Logan pointed out as he lit a cigarette. "I think that episode with Apocalypse in your brain give you a hint of what it's like to be evil, to think of no one but yourself. You like it, you like the dark thoughts in your head."   
  
Scott glared at Logan.  
  
"Don't look at me like that. I saw how satisfied when you threatened that drunk. Maybe that's why you went to Emma, she was a bad girl and you want her. You can't touch her physically so you settled for the mental affair." Logan blew out smoke and stared into Scott's visor. "We all have a dark side; some of us express it more than others."  
  
"I..." Scott started and then stopped almost ashamed.   
  
"What?" Logan asked half expecting what Scott was about to say. "If you want something, say it. I won't disrespect you because you are not a boy scout twenty-four seven."  
  
Scott stared at him and looked down. "I... I want to... I want to..."  
  
He can smell fear and hesitance. It was obvious what he wants but he had to let Slim say it. For his own good, he had to say it. "Spit it out."  
  
"I want to… I want to know what it's like." Scott finally choked out. "I want to know... what it's like… to be… to be…" He looked at him with fear and anxiety, "you."  
  
"To be me?" Logan asked, not skeptically like Scott expected, he somehow knew that is what he wanted.   
  
"I... was never drunk in my life. I rarely curse. I never started a fight... to just throw my cautions in the wind... I never did that. I... don't want to stuck like this." Scott shook and became silent, ashamed about the wishes that he finally said. It took all of his strength to get that out and he regret saying it out loud.  
  
Logan didn't say anything, instead he took Scott's drink and sniffed it. "Non alcoholic beer?" Scott didn't say anything but he turned slightly red in embarrassment. "Here, let me get you a real drink." Logan looked around for the barkeeper to see he was gone with the rest of the crowd. He hopped behind the bar and started to pour some liquor in a shot glass. Scott watched in amazement as Logan put the shot glass in front of him. "This will put hair on your chest."  
  
Scott blinked as he took the drink and down it. "GAH!" He took a deep breath as the burn ran down his throat and into his stomach. After coughing for a few minutes and getting the taste out of his mouth, he whispered, "Thanks."  
  
"Like I said before, we are only human. You've been through hell and being so... controlled about it would cause any sane man to just snap." Logan explained as he took his own drink. "Maybe, it's time to just lose the control, take a walk into the dark side." He poured Scott another shot of Vodka.  
  
"What if I hurt someone?" Scott asked fearfully, "What will the others think?"  
  
"Fuck the others. This is the X-Men; we all had our dark times. Threaten someone you love and they will forgive you." Scott downed the drink. He felt slightly dizzy and it was getting hard to focus.   
  
Logan poured another drink. "'Ro went punk and Rogue was part of the Brotherhood. Hell, Chuck tried to destroy the planet a few times over. You need a break from being a super boy scout."  
  
"Yeah." Scott tilted his head as he downed another drink. The taste wasn't there any more. Each time, it was getting easier to drink the poison. "I'm not... getting a Mo-hawk." He argued in a slightly slurred voice.  
  
"Just keep on drinking, Slim. I won't let you get a Mo-hawk. Ororo can pull one off but not you." Logan comforted as he poured another drink. "Just let me take care of everything."  
  
"Thanks... Logan... I knew you would understand." Scott moaned as he laid his head on the bar. "I'm not going back."  
  
"You won't go back. You're coming with me." Logan said as he helped his slightly drunk friend off of the stool. "You can't go off to the dark side without supervision."  
  
"Yeah... I don't wanna... *burp* 'scuse me, fight any suhper heroes." Scott agreed as he leaned on the shorter man. "Why are you helping me?" He asked in a slightly clearer voice. "You could just take advantage of Jean and..."  
  
"I'm not that kind of man." Logan argued, "Jean's... slightly out of it herself. I don't trust myself near her. With the way she's feeling, she might do things she would regret. I still have feelings for Jeannie, that's why I'm not sticking around. I'll be damned if I become part of the reason your marriage fall apart."  
  
"The floor's tilting." Scott observed as he held on tightly to Logan for support.  
  
"You're tilting, Slim. I know a place where we can rest for the night and after you sober up, we can start getting you to loosen up." Logan grunted as he heaved Scott across the doorway.  
  
"Whut about the bike?"  
  
"I'll take care of the bike. Just focus on staying on your feet." Logan instructed as he helped Scott into the car and buckled his seatbelt. "Stay right here."   
  
He put the motorcycle on top of the car's trunk and strapped it tightly. His healing factor had taken care of the alcohol in his system, his breath stunk but he can pass any drug test. He went into the driver's seat and stared at the fearless leader. His breathing slowed and became relaxed. He was asleep. There were times when Cyclops had to shoulder the burden of the entire X-Men and buckled down. Other X-Men can panic and let loose but not Scott. Many times, Scott would be the one guiding him back to his Humanity, to his home. Cyclops spent so much time leading that he became lost himself. Logan owes him so much and he is a man who repays his debts.  
  
The car started and he drove down the road. He didn't know if he was doing the right thing buy showing Scott the dark side. For all he knew, he could be helping Scott turn into a super-villian but he doubt it. Scott wasn't the type. He had to do it. He had to help Scott explore the other parts of his soul for his sanity's sake. At a stop light, Logan paused and gazed at Scott, who was semi-unconscious. "Just leave everything to me, Slim."   
  
The End... 


End file.
